The Help by Kathrynn Stockett

I went on a vacation with my sisters, aunt and mom. My mom bought me a book to read on the driving trip but I get sick when I read in the car and I was too busy having fun to read it on the vacation so I read it a different time. I was so grateful my mom got me this book. It's called "The Help" by Kathryn Stockett. I had heard about it every once in a while and even heard that it was becoming a movie but I had no idea what it was about. Which made it more exciting to read. Of course I read the back of the book and the synopsis. It is a story about change in the 1960s. A time I was defiantly not a part of but only learned about in history class.

I finished the book at the end of August this year. It was one of those books where I read it at work whenever I had a free moment or the kids were just playing. It was an amazing book! This book takes place in Jackson, Mississippi in the 1960s. It tells of how three women changed the dynamics between the white folk and the black folk during this time in our U.S. history. How you ask? Well by telling it how it is. A brave writer named Skeeter complies interviews of the black help on how it is/was to work for white people. Skeeter could not have done this without the help of Aibileen and Minny.

I thought the time that it was set in was timely. I never lived in the '60s but this gave a good representation. The depiction of the 60's was portrayed through the eyes of two black women, Aibileen and Minny, and one white woman, Skeeter. So it offered a variant of point of view. The way Stockett used first person in the book made it very real. Especially when Aibileen and Minny talked. You can almost hear that thick southern accent. It's also neat how there is the point of view from Aibileen and the point of view from Minny, two women of similarity yet different enough to let their personalities show.

I especially loved Skeeter's character, the white woman that "talks." She aspires to write therefore I am naturally drawn to her. The villain, Hilly, is portrayed as a classic '60s wife who is beyond racist, manipulative, and judgmental. She fully deserves to get a lawn full of toilets.

By reading this book and getting acquainted with the characters, it makes you wonder which character would you be. The judgmental Hilly, the concerned Skeeter, the follow-the-crowd Miss Leefolt, the drunken Miss Celia, don't-care-what-you-think Minny, or the loyal Aibileen. I am anxiously awaiting to see the movie and hoping not to be disappointed.

A Healthy Dose of Realization

Here are some syringes. These syringes represent doses of realization that life hands out to you on occasion. The dose that I have been given in the past month has been the syringe farthest to your left.

It absolutely sucks when realization hits you in the face, punches you in the stomach, stomps on your foot, and smacks you across the head. Operation Big and Sexy Dream is much bigger than I had anticipated. So much to work on but I have started, and that's what matters. I am going to abbreviate Operation Big and Sexy Dream into OBSD. It sounds like the latest in recreational drugs but it's to long to spell out all the time.

I have not realized how far gone I've let myself. It's like going into a house that you've never been to, with an expectation that you have to clean it. But when you go in, it's like walking into one of those houses on "Hoarders." The job is WAY bigger than you expected! I've got so much work to do physically, spiritually, and mentally. I have thought about doing a video journal. I have done all sorts of journals but never a video journal. It would definitely get me out of my comfort zone and insecurities. We'll see though.

As hard as those realizations have been, OBSD has been going along great these past couple months. I have gotten done with my 2nd week of doing yoga at the YMCA. I go every Monday and Wednesday at 7:00 pm. It works great because Sam is here to watch Lilly. Also, I have to manage how much I eat for dinner when I get off work (which is at 5:00 pm), because I can't do yoga on a full stomach. On Tuesday and Thursday, I go walking with my friend Natalee. We meet at the church, which is walking distance from the house, and we go walking. Where we live there are a lot of hills so we can get a pretty good workout. I bring Lilly with me in a stroller and she does great! Although this past week I skipped one day with walking and yoga because of 4th of July and the Relief Society Party.

These walks with my friend are doing a great job. I'm noticing a definite difference physically and mentally. Although I've had a cold the past few days, I still feel pretty good. I've been going to bed at 11:00 pm give or take a few minutes. With my new schedule I've been eating better. My legs are a lot stronger too. I've been drinking lots of water. I have gotten some sweetener for my water, because after drinking it so much all day, it gets old. The sweetener I use has low calories, zero sugar, and tastes really good.

Although, walking and yoga have helped greatly, I've decided that doing these things isn't enough. Especially because most of my problem (physically) seems to be my lovely midsection. I've been stretching, breathing, and cardio but nothing with my abs. Granted I do get s little work on them during yoga but not enough to where I feel it. I'm just not sure as to how much I can keep doing. I mean with the schedule I have. My days seem full. I guess I could do ab work on Saturday. But that's the only day I get to sleep in. Sacrifice. What am I willing to give up for this mission? How important is it to me?

I need to adjust my goals. I need to focus on my stomach and how I would like to look instead of monitoring my weight. It sounds kind of shallow but it's true. I'm pretty happy with the rest of my body except my stomach. I mean, I still want to get healthy again. The thought of being able to walk around with 70 less pounds sounds levitating. I definitely think that keeping tabs on my weight is important but I have been basing results on that alone. I find myself caring more about how I look passing a mirror as opposed to weighing myself every day. I'm not even making it a goal to fit inside a size 7 pair of pants. The last time I fit into a single digit pair of pants was when I was in middle school. So that kind of goal is unrealistic to me.

OBSD isn't just about losing the weight. I want something more for myself. To have big dreams and the ability to have the confidence and faith to do whatever it is I want to do. I'm not saying the life I have right now is horrible. I love being married to Sam and having Lilly as my daughter. I have always wanted a career. I had always thought I'd have one before I got married and started having kids. I'm doing things out of order and I just need to go with it.

I want to be sexy again, espeically with the knowledge that I now know. as well as experience. I want to do it for my children, for Sam, and myself. I am just not happy where I am right now. I know I need to be content with what I have but it's just difficult and irritating when I want to progress, I want to move on but I feel I'm being held back.

Etabpu (Update spelled backwards)

.... I can almost taste it too! Only about moving out and not solving a crime about a peanut. (That clip is what I thought about when I first started writing this post. Can't help it, I love Spongebob). We are hoping to be moving out in the next month or so. Sam has an interview with a talent producer (I think that's what he's called) this week. He wanted to interview Sam for some projects that this man is doing. I know Sam will do great! He is also getting more hours at Stevens-Henegar College. Sam is almost done with the pilot for "The Helpdesk," a series him and Wade Towne are hoping to get to the big haunchos in Hollywood.

I have still been babysitting the kids. As hard as it is some days to be with kids all day, it's still nice to have a job. Plus, they all have runny noses so I feel like I'm wiping noses every minute. But it is better than 6 kids. It's also a great job because I can write. I have been having ideas come to me more frequently now. I am trying to write more on Examiner.com but haven't been successful at that so far, because I am burnt out at the end of the day. I also lost my food journal and have not found it...it's got to be somewhere.

Lilly is acting like a toddler. She has so much energy and her words are growing. She is soo cute and her personality brightens my day. Sometimes, though, she does throw in a tantrum. She runs around a lot talking her own language. She loves being with Anna and Joe-Jo (the kids I babysit). She can even say their names. She is also doing pretty well with potty training. We started introducing her when she was 18 months. We do it after she wakes up in the morning, naptime, and before bedtime. She is doing pretty good actually. She usually goes pee in the morning. We are just taking it as it comes. She hasn't pooped or anything, and that's the stuff I'm nervous about. Just because I am not looking forward to those accidents. But it will be great when she is fully potty trained. She is such an amazing child!

We have taken care of the cars for the most part. We were able to get the Tercel fixed and no more smoking, Hooray! The Escort passed emissions, even though Sam kinda cheated, but it beats having to do a $300 car repair. I am grateful that they still work. That's it for now!

5...4...3...2...wait... it's already been launched.

"Operation Big and Sexy Dream" launched June 1, 2011 (yes, I need to put the year) at about 4:30 pm. I originally was going to write this at the beginning of the month but seeing as how it is mid June....hey at least I'm writing it...right? We got home from our wonderful trip from Denver, and Sam & I went and worked out at the YMCA. We were able to get a family membership and some financial assistance so that was a blessing. We were there for about an hour.

I, at first, wasn't sure what to do. So I kinda...just...walked around and familiarized myself with the place. I'm sure I looked weird just walking around. I started with some cardio on a treadmill for 20 minutes uping the speed every now and again. I did a quick jog for a couple of minutes. I was just being wary of my heart rate and breathing. Like an good exerciser would do. After I did that I lifted some weights and did some arm and ab workouts.

I checked out the woman's locker room, which I hadn't been in one since high school. I saw a Zumba class, which made me all the more mad that I couldn't go to one due to scheduling conflicts with my place of employment. I'm just trying to find my rhythm.

I then proceeded to walk outside and waited for Sam. I walked over to the track and walked a lap. My calves were starting to cramp up. Which now that I look at my calves, I think one is bigger than the other. Hmmm. That was when Sam was tryin' to get a hold of me. We both felt great afterwards and we both, especially Sam, enjoyed working out together, even though we weren't really together. I'm tryin' to work out (Ha Ha) a schedule with work, a workout, and yoga. I'm also walking with Natalee Spaulding, a friend from church. We're hoping to get more sisters to join but we go walking at 7:00 pm for about 45 minutes.

I've also been more diligent about watching what I eat. I've been on a peanut butter and jelly sandwich breakfast for the past month and hadn't realized how much fat peanut butter has. I also am more aware as to what foods upset my stomach and try to avoid those because I just hate feeling horrible.

I've also started, unofficially, bellydancing. I'm just doing the basics from DVD's. It is actually a really impressive dance. It is helping me with my mid section, which is what needs help at this point and time. Plus, the music is so incredible! Sometimes, much to my own discretion, I will just bust out dancing to the radio in the bedroom when no one is watching. Yes, like what those cheesy songs tell you to do. But it really is fun.....Hee Hee.

Wicked by Gregory Maguire

I've just come to grips with my reading list. It doesn't all have to be classic literature. Those grips that I came to with myself was brought forth by attempting to read "The Scarlet Letter" by Nathaniel Hawthorne. I did not realize how hard this book was to read. So I'm saving that for another day when I can do it. Anyway, this book named Wicked by Gregory Maguire was, I think, based on some musical. Oh Right! It's called "Wicked." But this is the book I'm talking about mostly because I have not seen the musical yet. With this reading challenge I am trying to read the book before I see the movie, or in this case, musical. I'm glad I did! (As I usually am).

I was always curious as to what this story was about. I knew it had to do with The Wizard of Oz and how Glinda and Elphaba were friends but I had no idea it was like this. I am probably sure that the musical isn't quite like the book as the book is pretty dark. The story is about Glinda and Elphaba when they were young and in school and Elphaba's turning into the Wicked Witch of the West. I did not realize how political this book really is, which kinda bored me but that's because politics do that to me. However, the overall story was great!!! It did have some vulgar words in it and some not so clean scenes in it.

I love how Maguire tells most of it from Elphaba's point of view. I think his other books are like that but with different fairy tales. I haven't read his other books but I sure as heck am going to. He used words in there that I had never seen before and his descriptions were so unique. I loved how it took a child's story and made it into an adult book. It's liked how he created this whole new world of Oz that you wouldn't have thought existed.

I know this isn't a very long review but it was a really good read. Defiantly not for reading to the kids a bedtime story, keep the original Wizard of Oz for that. I am looking forward to reading more of Gregory Maguire's books.

Movies and Cars

So, I just got off the phone with my mother asking if I had updated my blog and I replied, "No." I was planning on it later today, you know when it was dark and I was bored. I also thought that I had the courage to play Silent Hill 4 by myself and, needless to say, I tried and after seeing the opening part...I got too scared, so here I am.

It has been a while since I've done a family update so here it goes. Sam has been working part time as a Graphic Design teacher at Stevens-Henegar College and has been enjoying it very much. He is also working with a strong group of people to create a production studio out here in the land of potatoes, which is even more excited about, as am I. Him and his coworker/friend Wade, with help from others and myself, have created a series called "The Helpdesk." They have just got done editing the pilot and are planning on more projects to come. Before Sam started doing this, I was reading up on screenwriting and thinking how wonderful this would be to actually try my hand at it. I am currently writing one and will go into more detail when I have it done. This also gets me excited to write more screenplays and do the movie stuff that me and Melissa use to do all the time.

I am still babysitting, however, this past week they have been gone camping so I got to have a week off. Good for my nerves, not so much for my paycheck. We also are having to have car repair done to both of our old cars this next week. This will be the first time that I have taken the Tercel into an actual car mechanic, that's not to say that my dad isn't because he is great with cars. I'll just be glad when the Tercel is not smoking from the engine and I'm not worried about it bursting into flames on one of my jaunts to Target.

Lilly is doing great! She is babbling on in her own language. A few words are decipherable. She says "No way," "No" and "Ball." She's getting there....Her and I have a game where she'll say, "MAmamamamamama" and I'll say "Lilly, Lilly Lilly Lilly." She puts her hands over her face and giggles. She is getting to be a little bit of a drama queen. She'll accidentally fall on her knees and then she'll cry and then lay the rest of her body on the floor as if she just broke both her legs.

Well, that is it for now, until next time.

Eat Pray Love By Elizabeth Gilbert

I finished Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert on May 10, 2011. I found it at the house where I babysit. I read it while I was there at work, when I had some free time. It was a great read! It came at a most needed time in my life. I was gonna watch the movie and read the book later, when I had my hands on a copy. With were we are financially , I can't go and buy it yet. So it was a blessing that I was able to read it when I did.

The basic premise of this story is about Elizabeth Gilbert's path to happiness. It tells her story of a devastating divorce and her journey of getting to know God and herself by going to Italy, India, and Bali, spending 3-4 months in each country. I find that so inspiring and noble. She's a writer by profession and the way she writes this book is of particular interest to me. She writes in first person and it's got the feel of reading her personal journal. Knowing what she was thinking at a particular moment. She is so funny and witty. The characters in here are so real (probably because they are) and enjoyable.

She made me feel like I was with her traveling but getting a VIP pass into her thoughts and feelings. I thought the book would be kind of boring but it was anything but that. It does have some language in it and the "F" word a few times, but really inspirational and enlightening. She is honest and open about her experiences and her life.

She had all these wants and thoughts when so much horribleness was happening... why can't I do that especially when I have so much greatness in my life. I don't have to be recently divorced or childless to have these wants and pursue them. Granted I might have to work around them but it is possible.

At first I didn't think I would finish it that day because I didn't want to neglect the kids. I was able to finish it and that made me happy. I wanted to rush home and watch the movie. We ate dinner and I started watching it with Lilly on my laptop but I was getting frustrated with her because she kept trying to push the buttons. I asked Sam to take Lilly. (He was glad I asked him). To be honest, (and it's really no surprise) I didn't like the movie as much as I liked the book. In the book I had so much more access to what Gilbert was thinking and feeling. The movie had stuff in there that wasn't in the book. Now with reading about scriptwriting recently, I have more of a sense as to why they changed things for the movie but that doesn't mean they should have done it. It so much great content in it I don't know why they felt like they had to change or exaggerate anything.

The movie adaptation was pretty on the spot, though, with regard to dialogue. Almost too much so. It's probably because I just got done reading the book. Plus it just looked different in my imagination. I also could have missed some things. I probably sound condescending and flip floppy.

Reading the book gave me a look at my life. I believe, for the first time in a long time, I saw my potential potential (I mean that as in noun and adjective, like potentially seeing my potential). My dreams have just seemed out of reach lately. I need to be patient and do my best to make of the situation. I can find happiness and balance in my life. Looking at this life with an eternal perspective. It's not easily achieved but when that is considered, it makes trials a little bit more bearable.

Gilbert mentions going to Italy "pinched and thin" and through her experiences she's "gained weight." I look at that aspect, rather I apply it to my own life but flipped. I keep the weight and have kept the weight. I have a hard time letting things go. I have come into recent experiences that have made me keep and not let go. That's not healthy.

There is a quote in the book that really made me think. "...Overall satisfying life of motherhood, and marriage and career. " She is referencing her friend who is married, just had a baby and is an artist. I realized that I have 2/3 of these things. I'm missing a career. So I feel incomplete. Yes, I understand that both motherhood and marriage could be a career and I love both. I just want to feel success.

I did stray off my classic literature list when reading this book but it was worth it (like it's a big deal). It is a New York Times Bestseller and very popular. Gilbert's book has inspired me to be at peace with myself, to pray to God and to find pleasure even if it is small. This is definitely a keeper. When you have you in order, everything else will be in order.

Here are a few quotes that I really enjoyed from the book:

"It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live on imitation of somebody else's life with perfection." -The Bhagavad Gita

"You are given life; it is your duty ( and also your entitlement as a human being) to find something beautiful within life, no matter how slight."

"You should never give yourself a chance to fall apart because, when you do, it becomes a tendency and it happens over and over again. You must practice staying strong, instead." -Elizabeth's Guru

"I will not harbor unhealthy thoughts anymore..."

"Tell the truth, tell the truth, tell the truth."

Operation Big and Sexy Dream

So what exactly is "Operation Big and Sexy Dream?" Well, it's an attempt to lose weight, get in shape, and stay that way. I weighed myself in February and my weight was 192. Weighed myself again on April 16th and I was 190. I weighed myself on May 2nd and I was 186. So slowly but surely I'm losing the weight. This babysitting job has definitely helped me. I found that when I was at home. I would mindlessly eat and snack. I also discovered that when I'm at somebody else's house, I feel guilty if I eat all their food, so I just limit myself and bring my own lunch. It helps me keep a tab on how much I eat.

I'm also looking at what I'm eating. I don't mean just staring at the food on my plate and watch it as it approaches my drooling mouth. What I mean is looking at the Nutrition Facts and comparing foods especially if their frozen. It's not bad to buy frozen food, you just gotta watch and look at what your eating. Compare different brands and different alternatives, because they are out there. Granted some might be more expensive and if money is an issue than go on to the next food and don't bother. I ask myself, "Do I really wanna put that in my body?"

Another approach I'm taking with weight loss is giving myself some room for failure. Not so much failure as it is wiggle room. I know for a fact that I will cave into those delicious Cool Ranch Doritos, especially if they are on sale. So I just go with it instead of setting myself up for failure. Although I am still careful when it comes to treating myself...or at least I try.

I love and enjoy food so I'm not gonna go on those rice cake snacks or those diets that are so restrictive and pointless because I know I'm not gonna follow it. Instead, like it's been said before, a healthy well balanced diet with exercise is what I'm going for. I believe I can enjoy good food and still be able to be healthy and in shape. After all, don't food critics do it all the time. It's all about moderation and balance (That is so easier said then done).

So my goal is to lose 10 pounds. I'm breaking it down into smaller goals. I'm already down by 6 pounds. That's not too bad. Plus, I wasn't obsessing over it. Bam! I try to weigh myself once a week or so.

I've been doing short 18 minute workouts at work while the kids are napping. I put aside certain days to workout. Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday. I'll be honest... it's hard to do it on Saturday because that's the only day I really get to sleep in. I'm still working out the kinks until I find the rhythm.

Sam has been wanting to get a gym membership. We have been looking at YMCA because it would suit both of us. I would have to do dance, Zumba or some sort of class. He also thinks it's sexy to go work out together which is 'cause we can check each other out while lifting those weights or doing those squats. Puts a new perspective on "Gettin' low." Oh yeah, baby!

Motivation [moh-tuh-vey-shuhn]

Motivation is a funny word. It's a noun, an adjective and I like to think of it as a verb. This supposed force that pushes us along in whatever it is that we do. Getting up and going to work, exercising, relationships, and, yes, living. It can be there one day and gone the next. Some people are good at it, some...not so much. Motivation can be monetary or just a good feeling.

Yet as funny as motivation is, it is one of the hardest things I struggle with. Maybe I'm not finding the right kind of motivation. Wait...there's no "maybe" about it. It's also hard to keep that motivation going. I understand I'm not the only one suffering from the lack of this "supposed force" but it's there and I need to deal with it. It's like those zits that come up every now and again. It's not like it happens 24/7 but when it happens, it's there, it's obvious, it's in my face (I guess more technically on my face if they are zits) and it's annoying.

So what do I do? I've heard different things. I've done a motivational board, I've done the reward system, I've done/am doing (...trying...) Sparkpeople. Okay that's only 4 things so I guess I haven't tried everything. There is something I have been wanting to try. I want to take a picture of myself. Not just a head shot or in something that will flatter my figure. But a picture that will help me wake me up (or "wak up" as Leah liked to say it back in the day)and see that I need to lose it. I'm just not the same person I was 2-3 years ago not even 4 years, but I can spend all this time and energy tryin' to figure it out instead of doing something about it. I don't want this to sound empty and unpromising. There's so much that I want right now. Losing weight and getting healthy isn't the only thing I have a lack of motivation in, it's a core to a lot of my other problems. I just need to be patient and persistent.

"Mmmm yesss, and how does that make you feel?"

I think my patience has slowly gone somewhere. I've thoughtfully ponder where it has gone. Maybe it's gone where all my other emotions have gone. Somewhere. It's like I've got to do a stupid Easter egg hunt for my emotions. They must have escaped when I was giving birth to Lilly or when I decided to get married without really growing up and experiencing the world first. Although, I do not regret getting married to the most wonderful husband or given birth to the sweetest spirit. I'm grateful for both of them in my life.

My fire has also seemed to dim. Dimmed so much to the point that it is almost out. A small ember in a exhausted burnt piece of wood. Where has my passion gone? I have been trying to make the choice of being happy... and it's been challenging but my mood has gotten better, I'll admit... so far.

I've been feeling a little overwhelmed. I've got a couple projects I'm working, on as well as work, and trying to get healthy and into shape. I'm starting to feel what it is to be a mom who juggles and it's challenging. It does make me want that free time I had so much of but didn't use it wisely. Oh well ya learn.

I've set up a schedule that I'm gonna try. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday are project nights. Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday are exercise nights. I'm also starting "Operation Big and Sexy Dream," which is an attempt to stay motivated to lose weight and get healthy. To go along with this operation, I want to bring myself back. I have let myself go and I'm not proud of it. That could be a contributing factor to my lost emotions.

I've got to let go of how things were and live in the present. Make new memories. Only I feel, for some reason, that so many dreams are out of my reach. I know that deep down (Yes I know that sounds cheesy but I don't care) I know that that's not true but Satan is good at what he does. I need to be stronger than that. Sam and I are so ready to move out and be on our own but there still are some things that need to happen first. I guess, it seems like financially, those dreams and aspirations seem out of reach. The student loans are the main reason. It's scary, but out of the mouth of George Micheal, I just gotta have faith.

My "New Job"

For anybody who has seen "Groundhog Day," you know the song that was in it that woke Phil Connors on that repetitive holiday.

"Then put your little hand in mine,
There ain't no hill or mountain we can't climb.
Babe, I got you babe...." on so on.

Well, this song has a new meaning for me but in the same context as Phil Connors on listening to a part of this song over and over and over again.

"I've got you babe" rings in one ear. The sound of tacky Valentine Day bears with singing countdown singers over and over again with the same chorus. And here to my other ear, as if a tour guide, the unknown wailings of an 18 month old girl who has had diarrhea in the past 24 hours and still won't be satisfied unless she's being held. Mixed in with the whining pointless "I wanna be held all the time" cry from a 9 month old boy who has go the strongest little limbs. Together, from these sounds seeping in through my ears meeting in the center of my head which also happens to be my brain. There the screeching redundant sounds clash in a tyraid of irritating sounds that grate my nerves like a cheese grater against sandstone.

I started my new job on April 4, 2011. I got it through a friend at church. I am really enjoying it! I watch a 3 year old girl named Anna and a 9 month old boy named Joseph. I also take Lilly with me. I drive to their house which is only about 10-15 minutes away so the commute isn't too bad. I get there at about 7:30 am and leave about 5 pm. So it's a full time job. It's nice because the parents are awesome and the kids really are well behaved. It's a chance for me to get out too and Lilly have some playmates. Anna and Joseph really are great kids! We have lots of fun. Although, I will admit, it is stressful at times, usually when everybody wants something at the same time. Anna is a great help and Lilly is loving being with other kids. Joseph is a strong little kid and is usually pretty happy, unless he's hungry, but so is all other babies.

This job has been a blessing as it gives me a chance to learn and grow as well as earn a little bit of money. Even if it is something I do everyday at home. I just get to do it with 3 children instead of 1.

The Lord of the Flies By William Golding

As one of my goals for this year is to further my reading in classical literature, I figure I'll start off with The Lord of the Flies by William Golding. I got this book from the library so as of now it's not officially apart of my book collection. I finished the book on August 3, 2010. It actually was a pretty good read. I never did read it in high school. Since it was a while ago since I finished the book, I'll go off of my memory. It is a memorable read don't get me wrong but it is definitely very...um...different.

I did hear things about the book on how sad and violent it is. I've heard it referenced many times in TV shows ("Lost") as well as movies and didn't really understand them until now.

I did think a lot about "Lost" as I read it even comparing it in similar ways. It does make you wonder what would happen if boys were stranded on an island. What would happen if no grown ups were allowed? What would happen if there were no rules? I think it's interesting how the first group of boys to turn savage are the ones who were apparently from the church and grew up around religion. I'm not saying religion turns you into a savage but with out rules and structure there would be anarchy and chaos.

The ending intrigued me too and surprised me. I thought they all would end up dead or kill each other but they were saved. It's sad that it happen like it did but William Golding was definitely trying to make a point. As I don't agree with all the childish violence and the sad death of Piggy, I think it has merit for being a classic. I'm just glad I didn't read it in high school.

Uncle Tom's Cabin By Harriet Beecher Stowe

My next book that I finished on my classic literature list is Uncle Tom's Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe.

I really enjoyed reading this book. I can see why it had such a profound affect on people as well as America during the time it was written. Stowe had such a strong opinion and beliefs and I think that was shown in this book.

I had bought the book at Border's when I was visiting Denver in August of 2010. I was reading it on and off for a few months. I'm surprised I still remembered what I had read in between moments of not reading. I finally finished it yesterday and I don't think I'll forget this story. Stowe must have been so courageous to write something like this during the times of the Civil War. She seemed so passionate about what she believed and didn't care what people thought. I don't know if all that's true but it would seems so with her writing.

The characters seemed so real, and most, if not all, were actually based on true people according to the final chapter entitled "Concluding Remarks." The way she wrote made me believe that I was back on the Kentucky plantations and among those people. I cried and go so emotional over the death of little Eva and the sudden departure of St. Clare. I couldn't help hating Legree and what he did to Tom.Tom's faith is a great example that should be followed by every Christian. I really enjoyed how she wrote it. She would write the story and go on side notes that would address the reader directly, then return to the story.

I even got inspired to do a story about Eva and Topsy, or maybe a screenplay about this book. There was a particular moment on page 298 with a great point of view. There could be a story just about Eva. She had such an impact on the characters in the story. I'm glad that I have this book apart of my book collection and would read it again.

Updatetation...I think that's a word

Where to start...I actually don't like starting it that way. It's like writing in my journal saying, "Well I know its been a while since I've written." It's like I'm making an excuse for why I haven't written or knowing that I should have but didn't because I was too lazy and then the regret sets in because I didn't and then I realize that it doesn't really matter because I'm the only one who reads it and then I think "what if the grand kids read it when I'm dead" then they won't know what has happened in the past couple months, so I have to give an overview on said past couple months and then realize that I could have avoided that if I just wrote in my journal regularly.

....But this is not my journal....

I have realized that it has been almost a year since we moved up here to the land of potatoes. Boise has been great although my sinuses and lungs would say otherwise due to the blooming of everything that I am allergic to, plant wise. Naw, the weather here has been beautiful the last week. We are going to plant a garden...eventually. The nights and early mornings are still a little chilly.

So, for an update. As of April 23, 2011, Sam and I are still living with Sherie and Denny. We have really enjoyed it here! Sam has gotten a job teaching graphic design/web design at Stevens-Henegar College (A local private college) as well as he is working with his brother Ben doing I.T. work. Sam doesn't officially start his classes until June but he is doing training and what not to prepare for it. He is really looking forward to teaching. As for me, I got a job babysitting 2 children, a 3 year old girl and a 9 month old boy. It's not much pay but it's enough. Plus, I can take Lilly and it's not a really high stress job as compared to daycare. It's from 7:30 am to 5:00 pm so I have to get up pretty early but I find that that is better for me. I wouldn't have thought that I'd go back to babysitting. I feel like I'm back with the Marsh family only I'm there longer and only have 3 kids but they are all different ages. Lilly is at the bittersweet age of 18 months, or 1 1/2 years. It's hard to believe she'll be two this year which has a lot of meaning. Not only is it getting closer to that crucial potty training time but I always thought that we'd wait until Lilly is two to start thinking about having another child.

Family planning, there's more to it than I thought. I want to be done having kids when I'm 40 (hard to think about that too.) and we are planning on having a maximum of 5 kids. I just know it would be frustrating when I finally get into shape and then get pregnant. At least, I would know what to do and what not to do. I thought about when we are going to have our next child has been floating around in my brain. However, after babysitting for the past 3 or 4 weeks, that thought has kinda drifted away for the time being. I don't think I'm ready for another child yet.

Sam is also getting involved with doing some local editing and video work. I'm going to attempt to do scriptwriting and really get into writing in general. I feel like that's what I need to do, I just need to get off my rump and do it.

So, yeah this is a short update of what has been happening. Taking this babysitting job has also given me an opportunity to write while the kids are napping. So I've been writing stuff on paper and then typing it out on here. We'll see how that goes.

Just another day in potato land.

My Goals...

Alright here we goooo!

My Goals for this year are

Get into Shape (Yes, it is)
Further my reading in classic literature
Write a story
Make money writing
Make a mean sauce (especially Alfredo)
Further my cooking
Finish my Quilt
Write often
Learn some dances
Try something I've never done before
Eat right portions

Updated...January